2019.

Maybe I am being slightly overdramatic when I say I feel like this year is going to be good.

One month in.

2019 is doing good so far.

I have started to work out a couple times a week. May not be much but in 2018, when I heard the word “fitness”, trust me when I say I would be on the other side of the world trying to erase the mere memory of such a word from my mind. Now, I actually voluntarily  decided to go to the gym before school, granted I do spend all my time in a small corner trying to convince myself that I don’t care what everyone else thinks.

My situation with friends is… it’s getting there. Last year, my friendships weren’t going too great. I won’t dive into it because I don’t want sympathy from people but that was that. A month in and I found a new group of supportive, fun, kind friends who can always make me feel embraced.

My schoolwork has been doing a lot better. I mean, (humble brag time), I am in top set for all my subjects. But, the stress was just completely overwhelming. When I tell people about the breakdowns I have over small tests, most people seem genuinely scared. I haven’t even got to doing GCSE’s or IB, I am literally still doing small end of topic tests and I still cry for hours on end. In my recent maths test, I was absolutely terrified. I ended up studying eight hours for a topic test on surds, standard form and sequences. In the end, I did actually do very well, and now my confidence is doing a lot better. It really makes me think I might have a problem.

Help.

I am managing my time better. This year, I may have gone a little overboard on all my activities. I am doing maths tuition Monday and Wednesday (it’s a lot more fun than it sounds), I have piano lessons on Tuesday, dance lessons on Thursdays, Chinese tuition on Fridays and before school workout on Monday. I did not think for a moment I would be able to manage that, my homework and time for me to read and relax. But hey, I am.

I have actually not been failing in the things I do. I did really well in my two Jazz Exams I participated in. I won a writing competition in my year group. I have already read several books since the New Year. And I have not deleted my Blog yet. *scattered applause*

So those are the things that have made my 2019 not seem like the pit of hell I thought it would be. At this point, no one really cares about me but I thought I really needed to just write it down, even if just for me. And if you found this extremely random post interesting or at the very least, not mind numbingly dull, I would love to be friends, you could comment how your 2019 is going or send me a link of a post you have done on a similar topic. (God I hate how full of myself I sound when I say something like that)

But…What Do I Know?