Hey guys
It’s definitely been a while
It’s been quite the journey, I’m sure we’d all agree.
I’ve definitely changed a lot, looking back on my last blog post, I have the urge to both laugh at how ridiculous I sounded, cringe at how embarrassing it is that that’s on the internet and cry because things were a lot simpler then.
My last blog post wasn’t even a week before one of my closest friend’s dad got diagnosed with COVID and for a week, we waited in agony for my dad’s test results. Thankfully, nothing of the sort happened. I am extremely fortunate that so far, no one I know has been severely impacted (two of my cousins did however catch the virus, but they are fine now)
Lockdown was enlightening. Of course, I don’t mean to sound insensitive to the terrible state of humans all around the world, I am praying that everyone is safe and I thank those who put their life at risk for the safety of others. All I mean is that, the alone time gave me a so much insight and time to finally focus on the scary things that were happening inside of me. (and it wasn’t too bad for the environment either)
The feelings that I no longer had goals, or dreams, or passions; the sense that as lucky as I am to have the life I do, I feel miserable in it. I lack purpose and I hated it.
In quarantine, I gave myself the room to get better. I formed a lot of healthier habits (meditating, exersize, stretching and reading before bed etc) and honestly I had never felt better.
My mind had time to wander. I let myself cry until I was dry, I mourned the death of my younger self that had been so full of life and passion, with the motivation to go for it, and then I healed. And I understood she was gone. And came to accept who I am now.
I don’t know who is still here by now. I’m sure many have changed as a result of all that’s happened. In light of everything, how could we not? But I hope that those that are still here are staying safe and doing alright. Maybe reach out to me and we could be friends? We could all use more of those.
But…What Do I Know?
(ah it’s been too long)
But What Do I Know? 
Hey, hope you’re doing well and thank you for sharing!😊 It’s reassuring to know that I’m not the only one who found lockdown difficult🙃 Stay safe x
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You’re definitely right! The lock down was helpful to some people. I know several people who enjoyed the time they got to spend at home. But I also know some people who couldn’t stand staying home for so many days in a row.
I’m definitely glad that you posted again, I was just thinking about you a couple days before this post went up! Good luck with your endeavors during the rest of the year!!!
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Hi!! Oh my god it’s so great to hear from you again! Yes, I definitely enjoyed it and I really hope to post again. I have so much stress rn now that I’m back to school so I’ll probably be posting soon :,)
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Stay safe! ❤
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You stay safe as well!! My classes have started back too so life’s been super busy!!
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It certainly has been quite a long time, hasn’t it? Glad to hear you moved on from that (it sounds off, but I can’t think of a proper way to express this).
It’s funny to see that I came back here just to check up on the blog out of a semblance of nostalgia, expecting radio silence, only to see two new posts lmao
Ironically, reading and replying to your posts helped me understand more about myself. I still feel purposeless, but now I have an inkling of hope for the future, even if very little. For that, I thank you.
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